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I've always wanted to do music reviews here at GhostOfTyrone. Perhaps I will, and this will be the first. The problem is, I can't seem to stay focused on the topic of music for too long before it turns into literally everything else (Yes, literally everything else). Regardless of that, let's proceed, shall we?

This is a sampler of the new album Black Rainbow, by the nice young boys of Aucan:

Nice, no? I certainly like it. When I heard this, my first thought was to do what I always do when I find cool, new music: brag to my friends. Here is that very brag, in its entirety:

“Um, yeah.
This is what people hear in their music caves after our R&B/acoustic/hip-hop/electric/rock/Röyksopp/lo-fi/Miracle/crate-psych quests get derailed by virtue of their conscious residency in a post everything world.
What is this? Just when you say "aaah, more like Black MOTH SUPER Rainbow".. wait, Burial? Wait, Portishead? Wait, am I okay with liking something that sounds this much like Portis... wait, HEALTH? Wait, wait... Oval? Well, shit, this is... wait, Yeasayer (and yes, as I write this - watching the computer scene in Willy Wonka, by the way - I do feel the phantom denim clinging too tightly to my legs, ghostly square framed spectacles blurring the point where that new, denim skin yields to a neatly drawn patterned shirt, right there in the optometric dead zone, just beyond my new, spectral beard).
Post post rock electro post dub prog pop wave?
And for crying out loud, what were people thinking in the 70s? It's like the Earth was a safari tour, and everyone thought "let's marvel at the fact that we're all almost human." And here's the other thing: what happened to Asia in the 70s? Maybe not the best question to ask a Vietnam vet, but apart from that, has any populated continent disappeared from view in any decade since WWII as did Asia in the 70s? Heck, even 70s Vietnam seems theoretical, like it can't exist without Creedence Clearwater Revival providing the backdrop for some "flock of hueys" montage. Think about it: French leave, "advisors", draft, "Vietnam everyone remebers"... five years... fall of Saigon happens one afternoon when everyone says "Shit! Get to the roof!"
Whoop - 700 Club just came on. Time to learn. There's Boehner. Countdown to Middle East Story BOOM Joint chiefs chairman "re-examining" our relationship with Egypt. Also, birth control is the devil. You knew that, right?
And hooray, Jeremy Lin lives a life through Christ. Just like Tebow. Because just like America was thinking this fall: "wait, the Broncos? I thought God liked the Knicks?"

Anyway, alright.”
And there you have it: my awful review of Black Rainbow, by Aucan. Of course, I knew I was not done. I hadn’t fully captured the feel of the album via the written word. I tried once more to communicate this to my friend:

“In trying to sum up a good way to explain Aucan, I thought "this sounds like the kind of music that would be the score/soundtrack to some relatively obscure French/German film from 2006 that was designed as a Bourne knockoff and managed to pull it off (mostly because Bourne films were knockoffs of the French and German films that preceded them)." Then I got to thinking about the new Bourne Legacy trailer that just debuted, and how some people have had a problem with the score - specifically, how it's not Moby's "Extreme Ways." Now, I have no problem with the franchise taking a new direction. Matt Damon is out, Jeremy Renner is in, the premise is that "Bourne wasn't the only Treadstone guy to get amnesia, go rogue, etc" - which I am fine with (better than having someone else play Bourne, if you ask me). But I do agree that the music makes this seem like a different movie altogether.”
So, ladies and gentlemen, that’s the long way of saying: “Aucan’s Black Rainbow sounds like the kind of music that should be featured in a Bourne film.

Here is the visual way of saying that:

Bourne Legacy Trailer:

Bourne Legacy GOTizzy Aucan Remix Trailer:

By the way, what did happen to Asia in the 70s?

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